Forums » Psychology

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    • October 24, 2018 3:40:28 PM PDT
    • tru

    • October 11, 2018 12:14:44 PM PDT
    • I loved a covert narcissist. I loved him, I knew what he was eventually and I thought unconditional love could last even if we were not together. The problem is, like the mask they create for themselves, they create another for you. It seemed most of the time he was talking to this strawman he made of me who had all the same negative aspects and shames that he did. He was a cheater so I was too, he was manipulative so even if I had no idea what I was doing I was just manipulating him with love. Hmmmmm it seems there are too many people in this relationship. It has nothing to do what the partner can do for these types of people its what the Psychopath or B cluster type do for themselves. We cannot love enough, counsel enough or even problem solve enough someone who cannot face who they really are and do it for themselves. Trying to have adult relationships with traumatized children......no, you have to leave that to professionals who are completely detached. This type of person rarely seeks mental health help. Its called self love and its #1 for all who are going to have healthy relationships. :)

    • August 20, 2018 7:30:50 PM PDT
    • I believe it should depend on context. If they can truly care for another person and that other person care for them, then who can go against them? Everyone deserves love. Now if they are incapable of love than that's different. They of course need the love and support of their family, but if they cause pain to all those around them then introducing a new form of love in their life could be unimaginably painful for them and their potential lover.

    • August 19, 2018 3:33:48 AM PDT
    • psychopathy is a psychological disorder that can be treated
      every human deserves to be loved
      also lack of empathy doesn't mean no empathy at all
      many people have psychopathic tendencies, that doesn't make them serial killers or really any kind of bad people
      it usually develops from childhood trauma and many of them seek help to function normally

    • June 14, 2018 9:35:35 AM PDT
    • Psychopathy is not treatable. Though research is still in its early stages, the condition seems to be caused by lesions in the brain, specifically in the left medial temporal lobe and the orbitofrontal cortex.

      For more evidence, review the work of Dr James Fallon, a neurobiologist whose study of psychopathic brains inadvertently revealed that he himself was a psychopath, much to his surprise, but apparently not to his family, who he loves and cares for to this day

    • June 14, 2018 7:17:52 AM PDT
    • I think that psychopaths could heal and develop the ability to have empathy and compassion and feel real loving attachment to someone (as opposed to the short lived dopamine high they feel) only if they want to. However they usually don't want to change so it's not possible. Do they deserve love? Well I think they have freewill and choose to stay that way and hurt people so no I don't think they deserve to be loved. They are to blame for their behaviour and are fully in control of it.

    • May 22, 2017 12:49:20 PM PDT
    • I like your questions! If a dear friend of yours had the opportunity to date a psychopath, and asked for your advice, I imagine you'd tell them the same thing. And you'd discuss with them what you think the answers were, or how they should to about finding them, yes? So do you believe psychopaths can find love? Is that love sustainable? Do you think your friend could develop a healthy relationship with this person?

    • May 21, 2017 9:03:23 AM PDT
    • Deserve? Irrelevant. Either happens or it does not happen. Do people who have done me wrong deserve to have the sun shine upon them?

      A better question might be can they find love? Possibly - what if it were with another psychopath? The next logical question is whether or not that love and relationship would be sustainable? And if it could be sustained, would that help keep the psychopaths' tendencies "in-check", as it were?

    • April 24, 2017 10:20:28 PM PDT
    • This feels like it is resting on top of an interesting discussion about whether or not empathy exists to begin with and, if it does to some degree, if it may be a byproduct of intuition. Along that line of thought, could it be that empathy (as in, relative empathy - I pretty strongly think that true empathy is impossible) is a trait of those who primarily experience and associate the world unconsciously, with psychopathy being a much more conscious range of experience/association? To be clear, I'm not at all trying to bring forth with this the idea that consciousness is more admirable than unconsciousness, rather I think that the hybridization of both is more useful than consistently leaning towards one or the other to any extreme degree.

      Edit: I guess I didn't even acknowledge the original question. I don't really feel like this can be answered because it seems like psychopathy can take a great number of forms and whether or not someone deserves something seems wholly like a matter of opinion.

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    • January 17, 2018 7:27:43 PM PST
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    • November 14, 2017 11:44:03 PM PST
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      helinlin20171116

    • November 10, 2017 12:33:44 AM PST
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    • August 30, 2017 1:58:55 AM PDT
    • IAS

    • September 1, 2017 12:20:09 PM PDT
    • Moral Foundations:

      Harm: 2.3
      Fairness: 2.8
      Loyalty: 1.2
      Authority: 0.5
      Purity: 1.3

      Values Scale:

      Power: 2.4
      Achieve: 6.5
      Hedonism: 6.0
      Stimulation: 6.0
      Self-Direction: 7.0
      Universalism: 4.6
      Benevolence: 5.0
      Tradition: 0
      Conformity: 2.5
      Security: 4.2

    • August 30, 2017 9:01:10 PM PDT
    • I still think this would be a great strategic pivot for projectevolove – a chance to outdo the dating site that boasts “Substance – Not Just Selfies” and a chance to do something for science. ;-)

      We know that the Myers-Briggs crowd is not averse to answering long questionnaires. These guys offer over 100 of them ( http://www.yourmorals.org/all_morality_values_quizzes.php ), many or all of which I assume have been validated at some level. If we had a way of incorporating our individual results in our PEVO profiles, I have no doubt that we'd find much to talk about. It might also broaden the appeal of projectevolove to a much larger population.

      Where to begin?

    • July 14, 2017 9:12:57 AM PDT
    • Moral Foundations Theory correlated with Big Five personality traits: http://individual.utoronto.ca/jacobhirsh/publications/Hirsh_DeYoung_Xu_Peterson_2010.pdf

    • July 5, 2017 9:18:50 AM PDT
    • Well i guess about political differences it wouldn't be a problem because improving your Mbti type means letting go of things and wrong ways of thinking, negative ideas, acceptance, .... But cultural differences lies partly on religions ... the main problem with Mbti = it explains that some people don't really speak or express the same way in some circumstances, so if you have the other's notice ...it tends to be easier but it's still the same problem with open-minds or narrow-minds. As long as you accept others ideas and you don't try to force them going your way meaning respecting them, then there are no problems... maybe it would tend to uniformation of culture by the way..

      Same with politics as long as people are free to choose, there would be no meaning having so many laws so many restrictions since no one would juge the others for what they would have done BUT well we would live like animals then rules of the stronger i guess ...

    • July 4, 2017 7:30:36 PM PDT
    • With a little training, people can make adjustments in their communication styles and in the expression of their cognitive functions without sacrificing their unique gifts. Can similar training help us bridge political and cultural differences? It begins with a framework. MBTI describes temperament, but how do we capture the domains of political and cultural values? Take a look at the academic work described at http://www.yourmorals.org/ . Try the Moral Foundations Questionnaire and report your results here.

    • April 24, 2017 9:59:37 PM PDT
    • This is extremely interesting, especially in the context of the things I have been reading and listening to lately (Jordan Peterson's Maps of Meaning, in particular).
      I wonder if another way to think about this could be that each force is its own spectrum, rather than in direct opposition to the other. What I mean is that the extremes of Logos could be said to be something like Strength/Learning/Growth and War/Insecurity, while the extremes of Eros could be said to be something like Confidence/Creativity/Nurture and Ignorance/Apathy. In that context, the location at which an individual would be found at any given time would be more a result of, I think, how much responsibility they willingly adopt. In this framing, they almost look like a representation of the masculine and feminine qualities of humans. My main point here is that perhaps merit can be found in the concept of the non-dual in a subject like this, that logos and eros are not in opposition and that, as with individuals with seemingly opposing traits and temperaments, the amalgamation of the seemingly opposed is another form of willfully adopting responsibility, which seems to be what bends each spectrum towards its most useful point, or at least regulates between the useful implementations of each end of a spectrum or apparent dichotomy...

      I'm not sure how clear what I'm trying to say is, as I'm just think-typing, but this is a really interesting subject that I think deserves to be revived despite its significant forum-age.

    • March 20, 2017 7:27:56 PM PDT
    • I usually shrug those things off. I like men, and I like women. I've been told that my particular set of kinks means I'm trans, but I'm not. Don't worry about it. Humans are weird and messy.

    • March 20, 2017 6:38:55 PM PDT
    • With the world the way it is, I am glad of a system which warns me if you are a she-male.

    • March 20, 2017 6:06:28 PM PDT
    • French bread pizza!

    • March 20, 2017 6:06:26 PM PDT
    • Mac-n-cheese!

    • March 20, 2017 4:06:21 PM PDT
    • You know what, I didn't bother to look it up before. Because I wasn't given a choice anyway. And I've never seen it anywhere, other than on this site.
      And even after reading it, I still don't get it.
      But apparently that's what I am. I'm being told what I am.
      Ok.