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  • Topic: Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

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    • October 22, 2013 3:45:37 AM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      The few encounters I had with INTJ females as an ENFP male where charged with sexual and mind stimulating intensity. It seems almost that the initial attraction is so strong and explosive that it is endangered to collapse very quickly. Which then results in the INTJ going back into their tunnel vision and the ENFP wandering on to explore the maze of the world.
      However my intuition tells me that INTJs have the ability to anchor and ground ENFPs with their strategic judgement and ENFPs can function as an inspiring connection to the outside world for INTJs. So there seems to be the positive potential for a long term relationship. My question is therefore: How do you guys deal with the intensity of the first encounter without freaking out in order to make it a sustainable relationship?

    • October 22, 2013 6:16:16 AM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      The thing is, usualy the one to freak out is the INTJ, and the ENFP (in my case at least) got dragged.

      Then eventually the INTJ begin to behave all the oposite to everything that she showed to you before.

      There was always something in my INTJ exes that didn't tick "right". And this feeling always proved wrong.

      INFJs are where my future lies! :D

      But i know that ENFPs just learn by experience, so good luck with that! lol

    • October 24, 2013 1:30:10 AM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      How do we deal without freakng out? Can't. We freak out, or pretend it's not happening.

    • October 24, 2013 1:30:52 AM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      And if we're not freaking out then we're totally blind to what's happening.

    • October 24, 2013 2:32:58 AM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      Had a long chat with an amazing INTJ girl yesterday. The solution seems to be the following according to her: As an ENFP always say for the record what is going on emotionally in that situation in a step by step analysis: 1) "I feel that there is a strong attraction between us. How do you feel about it?" 2) "We should take things further in my opinion. How do you normally go about a situation like this?". 3) I know that you need a lot of space and time to gain clarity over your emotions with regards to others. I am really happy to always give you that space as much as you need it. However right now there is this strong sexual tension between us. Therefore getting the sex out of the way asap would make the whole situation between us much more relaxed."
      There can be more than 2 steps building up to statement 3 if necessary. What do guys think?

    • October 24, 2013 2:44:36 PM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      Lol, there is no such thing as an amazing INTJ girl, they pretend to be amazing, they seen to be amazing and in the end it was just the lies of a psycopath that want to conquer you more than build anything together.

      I think i just got a bit traumatized!!! haha

      This post was edited by JosiasAcauan at October 24, 2013 2:49:18 PM PDT
    • October 29, 2013 1:49:52 PM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      Hey! Don't trash INTJs. People can never be amazing. In the end it is always a perception by the other person. It could just as well be that your perception of her was wrong (projection of expectations and hopes) and in the end she was just different. Happens everyday.

    • October 30, 2013 12:41:57 PM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      So you are telling me that ENFPs intimidate INTJ girls? If that is true that is very interesting and funny.
      What I know is the ENFPs style of communication is very dynamic, we are constantly jumping from subject to subject while making it creative and fun. Since they tend to focus on one thing I alway wondered how they keep up.

    • October 31, 2013 8:48:47 AM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      No Trix! If people tell and show something and then begin to act the exact oposite its not my fault to project things.

      If so my biggest flaw (and other ENFPs around the world) was to believe somethingt that had been show just to be proven false by the own person that showed it.

      Its like someone explicitly say "I will never open that door, just relax" then after 5 minutes went there and open the door while looking at your face.

      This post was edited by JosiasAcauan at October 31, 2013 8:50:03 AM PDT
    • November 7, 2013 6:47:46 AM PST
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FHpWyMydUE

    • November 7, 2013 5:00:53 PM PST
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      i have watched THOR2 yesterday and LOL its SO like this tread!

      The ENFP Thor needs to take the freaking INTJ girl out of the planet, have a lot of muscles, an imortal life etc to keep being interesting.

      But you know, not all of us can keep being so interesting ALL the time. I called it a life for intjs, had enough! :D

    • December 27, 2013 10:58:53 AM PST
    • Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      Breaking up with an INTJ has been the most devastating thing of my life. After True Love, her majestic silence has been a rational Sword of Damocles that still hang upon my head, over my rainbows. Soon after the chaos, I began to write poems in ode to that symbolic tragedy of freedom and pain so that her departed love still remains a form of inspiration: now safer, clearer, stronger, true. It is her, it is real, she left me but I'm still grateful for what happened.
      The so called sadistic superstructure of an INTJ is just an excuse for superficial judgements. If you look well they're made of pure delicate thoughts, and when they decide something it is very hard to let them change their mind, expecially if you're an ENFP in whom they "once" put all of their faith.

    • March 13, 2014 8:33:59 PM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      I haven't met my ENFP other half yet. I am not convinced she even exists.

    • February 5, 2015 12:34:25 AM PST
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      *deleted (is there a delete button here?)

      This post was edited by Parvan at February 5, 2015 12:39:07 AM PST
    • February 5, 2015 12:39:23 AM PST
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      JosiasAcauan said:
      Lol, there is no such thing as an amazing INTJ girl, they pretend to be amazing, they seen to be amazing and in the end it was just the lies of a psycopath that want to conquer you more than build anything together. I think i just got a bit traumatized!!! haha

      Very true.. don't trust us :/ *after analysis of myself I think INTJs grow out of that kind of thing. INTJs tend to suppress emotion which can lead to strange "issues" in an emotional relationship. Sometimes this scares an INTJ and they run away back to the safety of "pre-relationship." (Maybe that makes sense. I'm tired.)

    • March 16, 2015 5:11:43 AM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      I think this relationship can work quite well - in fact, it's one of the best matches for ENFPs along with INFJs and other ENFPs.

      The main issue I see is that ENFPs get infatuated very quickly, while INTJs usually take a long time to fall in love - sometimes months, or even years. ENFPs typically have to be extremely patient with INTJs, it seems.

      Also, I think that the relationship usually works more effectively if the ENFP is very emotionally secure and independent. If the ENFP is quite sensitive or has unresolved issues, they will probably find the TJ bluntness hard to deal with.

      Personally I would prefer to be with an INFJ, but I've met some lovely INTJ guys too.

    • March 23, 2015 1:35:41 PM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      Well, I am an INTJ that can fall in love 'quickly'. It won't take years. When the person has struck some sort of chord with me, they're in. It could take weeks. But that rarily happens...and yet I am fortunate to meet deeply interesting individuals from time to time. when it happens, it usually is genuine:) I think, we all seek truth and depth.
      My experiences with ENFPs so far were not so positive, but I try not to generalize for the whole group. I think, ultimately it is also a case of maturity.

      The ENFPs I knew, had issues with self-esteem and even one of them I think I have to classify as a narcissist in retrospect. Sure, really a people person on the surface...but I found it very fatiguing to deal with him. Like walking on eggshells the whole time.

      He needed to be the center of adoration,his feelings needed to be considered at all times, him acting before he thought about it... and in the end, not considerate of my feelings, even when I expressed what the effect was. I had to resort to writing him a letter, that I forgave him despite of all this...but I just do not want to have anything to do with him.

      Technically, I think INTJ &ENFPs can boost each others strengths. There is also this chemistry with ENTPs....I have experienced that and I love it. There is such a flow of ideas :D


      This post was edited by Monogatari at January 1, 2016 8:58:54 PM PST
    • April 8, 2015 9:41:29 AM PDT
    • Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      This is interesting because three of my very closest friends are ENFP and I adore them as friends, but I could just NEVER see myself dating an ENFP. I can't really pinpoint a specific reason why, but I know a lot of ENFPs very well and have never felt an ounce of attraction to any of them.

    • May 25, 2015 10:33:52 PM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      I agree. I've known several confirmed ENFPs and probably many more. My sister is one as well. I have not met one yet with whom I could even fathom a relationship. I find them to often be very argumentative especially when they feel that righteousness is on their side (which seems to be most of the time). I may be a bit biased today, however, as I just spent an hour arguing with one.

    • September 11, 2015 10:22:14 PM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      Clemens said:
      Had a long chat with an amazing INTJ girl yesterday. The solution seems to be the following according to her: As an ENFP always say for the record what is going on emotionally in that situation in a step by step analysis: 1) "I feel that there is a strong attraction between us. How do you feel about it?" 2) "We should take things further in my opinion. How do you normally go about a situation like this?". 3) I know that you need a lot of space and time to gain clarity over your emotions with regards to others. I am really happy to always give you that space as much as you need it. However right now there is this strong sexual tension between us. Therefore getting the sex out of the way asap would make the whole situation between us much more relaxed." There can be more than 2 steps building up to statement 3 if necessary. What do guys think?

      HAAAAAAAAAAAA !!!!!!! I am laughing so hard at this! Putting the puppy-energy-excitable intuitions of the never-sit-still ENFP into step-by-step clarity for the INTJ sure lends itself to some enjoyable verbal irony! I'm cracking up! However, I would leave off step 3 altogether. Having sex when you're not married leaves me feeling used and insecure about the relationship. I need the promise. I need to know. I need the ring and the house. ...Then... BRING IT ONNNNNNN !!!!!

    • October 2, 2015 11:38:01 AM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      im an enfp and have an unfortunate possession by intjs. to my knowledge (one relationship i had was before i was introduced to intjs so my data is incomplete) all of my romantic relationships have been with intjs. the sexual and intellectual stimuli intjs provide is so electrifying -even addicting - that i always find myself weak at the knees around them. That said i am single lol so i have never found an intj enfp pairing to be while erotic and provocative on many levels sustainable. intjs at least in my experience are very invalidating which is very damaging to an enfp especially a sensitive one (which we all tend to be) i have found intjs to be very dismissive of an enfps intellectual contributions because a lot of our knowledge is intuitive rather than factual and since we cant "prove" or quantify our beliefs in any factual way intjs disregard or insights as childish underdeveloped whims. cracking the enfp intj code: enfps fall hard for intjs but intjs either dont know how to show that they value their enfp or just simply dont value them for reasons stated above leading to disaster. having been burned so many times now this enfp is going to look for greener/more nurturing pastures in more NFs

    • October 31, 2015 10:58:59 PM PDT
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      As an INTJ myself, I find that I usually put forward a number of "faces". None of them are not me, they just are sides of me required for the task or interaction ahead. That might be why INTJs get a bad rep for not being honest and upfront, mainly because we function so differently. I don't have a relationship with an ENFP to compare notes on, but I do get along astoundingly well with my brother, who is very much an ENFP. I can see how it could be very rocky, but a relationship between an INTJ and an ENFP would seem to me to be one of adjusting. The ENFP has to adjust to the bluntness of an INTJ to understand that the INTJ isn't being blunt to be mean. The INTJ also has to adjust to be more tactful and careful with said bluntness. I'm horribly blunt, and make no apologies for pointing out flaws, but my brother has helped me understand how to be more considerate of others feelings in my evaluations. Breaking past the rocky parts, the two compliment each other extraordinarily well.

    • November 1, 2015 5:05:35 AM PST
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      I have to be married to have sex. It is just my upbringing, and my religious belief system. I want the person I make love to - to be the one that loves me back, forever.

    • November 14, 2015 12:58:52 PM PST
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      I don't appreciate the negative generalizations about INTJ girls and I think that they're the result of misunderstandings. We have a lot of layers and they are all parts of us so maybe that's why a much more opened and sharing ENFP could think that we're pretending. I had a short but intense relationship with an ENFP guy once. I loved talking to him, he pushed my out of my comfort zone and the sex was amazing. Unfotunately we had completely different interests and ambitions and even though he didn't care about that I did. I also didn't appreciate his constant 'drama' and the need to be the center of attention. However, I would love to try a relationship with an ENFP again, just with one that shares my interests.

    • November 15, 2015 6:29:11 AM PST
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      Cracking the INTJ - ENFP code?!?

      We should all not generalize on the basis of a few experiences. I personally, will not limit myself in any way.

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