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  • Topic: flirting with an ENFP

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    • May 21, 2015 1:58:33 AM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      It seems to me that ENFPs basically flirt with everyone. How is it possible to know if an ENFP is interested in me, or is just simply being their natural, flirty self?

      And is it possible to have genuine, one-on-one conversations with an ENFP? I feel like there is a lot of chemistry between myself and a particular ENFP guy, but I want to be able to explore that connection, and yet trying to have a genuine converssation with him is like trying to catch a butterfly!

    • May 22, 2015 2:39:54 PM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      I found that first line very funny :))

    • May 23, 2015 12:02:29 AM PDT
    • flirting with an ENFP

      You know, now that I think about it, ENFP's really do flirt with everyone. I suppose it depends on your definition of flirting, but it's basically unavoidable. Maybe almost any conversation an ENFP has can be considered flirting.

      They're communicators, and they're good at catching all the little triggers to conversations.

      Every ENFP is different though. I'm speaking purely out of my own experiences, but there wouldn't be an exact guide to decoding a personality like this.

      Genuine conversations are always very abundant in my life. They're always appreciated.

      It doesn't sound like an ENFP to stray away from meaningful and interesting conversation. Maybe you've come across a particularly silly and lively extrovert.

      I can relate to that. I can also say that it was something I grew out of. Isn't this ENFP an adult?

      Oh well. Be yourself. Be casual. Don't force anything. Let the inspired set the pace.

    • May 23, 2015 3:06:41 AM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      I thought that all ENFPs are particularly silly and lively--that it's just a characteristic of this personality type. Unfortunately, there is also a bit of a language barrier between us, so that adds an extra element of difficulty.

    • May 23, 2015 8:29:05 AM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      We LOVE on everyone. See the beauty in all and everywhere. An ENFP would be shocked to hear their intentions are taken different. That being said, they're the easiest to attract with goofiness, and anything charming or beautiful. Going 'after' an ENFP may make them feel stifled.

      Show you genuinely care for them as a person. Share in their adventures. Spend enough time alone with a single ENFP and you'll be privy to that never satiated love appetite they have and you'll be left shocked (and rocked :) ) in the sheets.

    • June 1, 2015 1:37:11 AM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      I WISH I could spend time alone with him, but he is ALWAYS surrounded by other people--especially girls. :( Even so, I still get the feeling that he is just as attracted to me as I am to him, and that he gets jealous too whenever I talk to other guys.

      This weekend we were at a church retreat. Almost as soon as I arrived he asked me to go for a walk with him, but since it was raining pretty hard, I assumed he was just teasing me. Only now I'm kicking myself for making that assumption because there is never an opportunity like that one might have been. And after that, he was flirty with everyone, but also seemed to sort of get a little bit distant from me. I'm pretty bummed to think he might have been serious, and I might have missed my only chance. :(

      This post was edited by CCamilleS at June 2, 2015 12:56:08 AM PDT
    • June 4, 2015 12:01:19 AM PDT
    • flirting with an ENFP

      No, ENFP males will make plans to be with you if they like you. They will consistently show up and tease you when they like you.

    • June 4, 2015 3:17:29 AM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      No what? If he actually does like me, then I didn't miss my only chance? He'll try again if it had indeed been his intention to spend time with me? Is that what you meant?

      I can say that he teases me--a lot. But he teases everyone. That's what I can't tell about ENFPs. You say that an ENFP will tease you if they like you, but in my experience, an ENFP just teases everyone.

    • June 22, 2015 8:25:12 AM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      Seriously, my experience with ENFP females is that you will never know if they are into you or not. I'm not sure if guys are the same way. I had a real fight on my hand to find out exactly where I stood with my ENFP ex before we actually got together. Did not make the best start of a good, healthy relationship. I never felt like I was "someone special", actually the opposite - everyone else came first when we were together. Maybe because I'm ENTP, and I'm hard work, but (also because I AM ENTP I think this way...) the actual problem was that we were not meant to be as she wasn't willing to meet me anywhere near half way.

      My advise is to lay it all out on the table. Go out with him - alone, AND in a group setting - and see how you get treated and whether you like it/can handle it.

    • June 22, 2015 9:53:19 AM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      It comes from ENFPs who lack maturity. We don't come forthright and tell you if we're into you a or not. ENFPS men can be the same. I'm a ENFP, though I've matured

    • June 22, 2015 10:18:17 AM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      I hear you on the maturing thing. Problem is, I'm very intuitive and knew she liked me once I gathered certain info and filled in the blanks. Months spent trying to convince myself to move on failed, and we enturally were together for a turbulent 10 years - still no maturation.

      I am personally erring on the side of caution with female (at least) ENFPs when it comes to matters of the heart. Again, the OP has a completely different personality to me so she might be fine regardless whether he is mature or not.

    • July 11, 2015 5:48:04 AM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      I think this guy has convinced himself that I rejected him--at least he has been acting towards me as if he feels hurt and rejected, even though he never actually asked me out. We were not in a relationship, but he got hurt and pouty when he saw me talking to other guys. Now it seems he's trying to punish me. It feels like we had a break-up fight, even though we never dated! And the thing that makes me really hurt and sad is that if only he just would have had the courage to ask me out, I would have.

    • August 30, 2015 2:00:21 AM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      This is a hilarious forum topic - I'm a INTJ girl who wishes to God she knew more ENFP guys, and the one that I know... well let's just say there's never been a spark between us (he's just a friend) but I would definitely describe him as a goof and a flirt. It's ridiculous. It's so funny how much he flirts with random people - if only he could focus his flirting in a productive direction - maybe I could take him more seriously! Haha now I'm laughing at how this sounds.

    • October 31, 2015 10:42:30 PM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      My brother is an ENFP, and going off of how he does things, he seems like a flirt but really isn't. He's just so friendly that he comes off as flirting because he doesn't know a stranger. And I gotta say, as an INTJ, I have no idea why I get along so well with him.

    • April 6, 2017 9:38:30 AM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      My friendliness is generally equal between Women and Men. It could misunderstood as flirting, but I feel it as friendliness. I tend to become more reserved around a guy I'm actually interested in. Like a 7th grade crush!

    • September 16, 2017 4:17:19 PM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      All you need to do is look directly into his eyes and nod while he talks about about himself. Ask questions about what he's talking about. ENFPs appreciate attentive listeners and will immediately notice you

    • September 16, 2017 4:47:35 PM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      As for ENFPs being flirts, ENFPs seek to create deep emotional relationships with every person they meet. Sometimes immature ENFPs can't help themselves and will continue to build that relationship even after they realize the other person has developed feelings for them, even though they have no intention to reciprocate. A mature ENFP knows not to do this as they have learned that they can break many hearts this way, as it is "leading them on." The ENFP does not see this as leading them on, because the ENFP treats everyone this way. If an ENFP actually really likes you, they'll typically consciously make it obvious using their body language.

    • November 3, 2017 7:18:33 PM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      Well put Luke314. A struggle for sure.

      "ENFPs seek to create deep emotional relationships with every person they meet."

      "ENFPs can't help themselves and will continue to build that relationship even after they realize the other person has developed feelings for them, even though they have no intention to reciprocate"

    • The following users say thanks to Albin for this useful post:
    • April 18, 2018 3:45:39 AM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      <snip> If an ENFP actually really likes you, they'll typically consciously make it obvious using their body language.</snip>

      Fascinating point. Obvious with body language such as invading of personal space and hugs? Say more if you could. (Even though these posts are months old)

      Thanks

    • April 19, 2018 9:37:46 PM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      I am having trouble understanding why this is difficult. Couldn’t you just ask him if he is interested? Maybe invite him out for coffee or something for a bit of alone time to really find out.

    • September 10, 2018 8:42:06 PM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      I am very flirtatious but if you're interested just ask. Worst case scenario you'll be given a nice let down. Alternative, myself, I'm a very confident ENFP and if you show me that you like me - give me any signs, bat your eyelashes, brush my arms or my legs, you'll get asked out on the spot.

    • September 16, 2018 11:01:31 PM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      We tend to be very physically affectionate, well- with everyone we feel connected to. We hug our friends. We touch people's arms in encouragement or grasp their hands in contagious laughter. But if we are "into" you, it's different. We linger. We create grand gestures. And if they go unnoticed or unreciprocated, we can get our feelings hurt. This softens with age and maturity, but it is nontheless a type trend. As to feeling his hostility... the predictable meltdown point of the ENFP is introverted sensing. Every type has an inferior function that is unhealthy and can never be mastered. I-S is poison to us. We can't do it. If he perceives that gestures have been unnoticed or that he has been rejected through multiple attempts, he might just be in a protective mode.

      Anecdotally, (I haven't actually studied this with good research design) ENFP's love language tends to be a close need between touch and words, in both the way that we give and the way that we receive. Watch for an abundance of those from your ENFP. The negative about us in a relationship (or when we are very interested), is that we can come across as smothering and needy. We don't see ourselves that way. We just want to connect deeply and "fall into" the object of our affection and melt away like two sticks of butter. Most people love this attention and passion at first, but it seems that we sustain that desire and ability long after our partners have settled into wanting to just go about a normal routine. When it dries up, we often feel unfulfilled and possibly jilted, and as if our needs aren't met. We want soulmates and deep authentic connections. We can sustain it for years. That's why I want another ENFP in my life.

    • September 16, 2018 11:04:29 PM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      Hey DallasENFP so you want to date another ENFP?

      I think it has potential. I went on two dates though with a female ENFP much like me in June and it was weird so we broke it off. But like I said, it has potential.

    • September 16, 2018 11:13:50 PM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      Hey Moby! Yes- I have found that I am usually not immediately romantically attracted to ENFP men and tend to friend-zone them, but I have also found that if I give them a chance, the rewards are boundless. Being so similar poses challenges--- we might be tempted to compete socially and we read each other's BS coming and going, but even that can be growth promoting. But conversations are endless, play is equally creative, we continually teach, learn, and grow, we share the same outlook on life even if it leads us to different conclusions, and we share a similar desire for deep connection and passion. We also share the same quality of not giving up easily on a partner we "imprint" upon, so the shared commitment carries us through difficult times.

    • September 16, 2018 11:13:52 PM PDT
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      flirting with an ENFP

      ...

      This post was edited by DallasENFP at September 16, 2018 11:14:30 PM PDT

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