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  • Topic: why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

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    • April 2, 2016 2:06:30 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      I run into this description of ENFPs a lot on different websites and forums and have heard a lot of people on this cite say that. it honestly cuts pretty deep because i try really hard to empathize and be considerate of others needs/feelings. so tell me, what is this critique about?

    • April 2, 2016 2:08:45 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      I don't think that they are i think they are just misunderstood

    • April 2, 2016 2:33:15 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      I don't think we're self-centered. For me, at least, I empathize so strongly with others that it's very exhausting and taxing on my emotional well-being. If I'm having a great day and I chat with someone who starts ranting about what a shitty day they're having, my day starts turning shitty too. That's why I think a lot of ENFPs try to distract themselves and others by making silly jokes, mentioning funny TV shows/stories/etc, and just trying to avoid negativity in general.

    • April 2, 2016 2:39:57 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      My relationships with them have always been centered around our ability to entertain each other for a long time, but self-centered? I am going to have to say: maybe? They seem self-centered, but in a way that benefits me while they are being that way. In a serious relationship, I have no idea how that would work out, since it can't be simple fun 24/7, right?

    • April 2, 2016 2:54:19 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      what makes you say that? that they are self centered?

    • April 2, 2016 3:30:04 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      Well I can only go by the ones I have known personally, and one of them told me outright that she was self-centered. I think I am pretty self-centered too so in the long-term, we'd fall out because we'd each assume things about the other based on lack of communication, but then we would have a chat and everything is fine again.

      The other one was a really loud girl I knew from high school, she would constantly mock everything and everyone around her; sometimes it was funny and sometimes it wasn't, but whatever the connectivity of her jokes, she was always the biggest fan of her own sense of humour. I'd say her bratty nature was a very self-stimulating thing. When I got to know her a bit better I found out that she sometimes suffered from self-esteem problems. But throughout school she had no problem humiliating other people for her own enjoyment.

      I also had an obviously ENFP couchsurfer stay with me once; it was impossible to ever get her out. She always told me she was leaving tomorrow, but by the time she was up and out the door, it was already 6 PM and she had to stay for another night.

      Fun times, but I can imagine they'd get very annoying quickly if you took life a bit more seriously :P

      This post was edited by Bazy at April 2, 2016 3:33:19 PM PDT
    • April 2, 2016 4:13:29 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      I like seeing if I can make them cry.

    • April 2, 2016 4:57:28 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      It's kind of hard to make ENFP women cry despite their sensitivity.

    • April 2, 2016 6:14:05 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      @KNich: Exactly! So I don't even feel remorse afterwards. It's the only way I know to deal with their constant happy-rainbowbutterflyvomit-wtf-ness

    • April 2, 2016 6:24:18 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      At least two of my sisters are ENFPs. And I'd say they appear shallow and lacking depth because they prioritize nice feelings over anything else. Although I've had some very deep conversations with ENFPs, they eventually ef it up by getting awkward and depressed/quiet, or by cracking a stupid joke. So while I still think it's a fair generalization to say they're a bit shallow, I'd say they're more misunderstood than anything else. . . Maybe.

      This post was edited by DoesNot at April 2, 2016 6:25:11 PM PDT
    • April 2, 2016 9:40:18 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      Honestly, whether or not an ENFP can maintain a serious conversation depends on who they're talking to and how mature that ENFP is. For example, if you're a friend of mine, I'm not going to try and keep from being my random laughing self unless I can sense that something really is troubling you. If you're a stranger and/or I don't like you, I'm going to bullshit you with my randomness until you give up and go away. My friends and I have deep discussions all the time for hours on end. Your ENFP probably cracked a stupid joke in the middle of your discussion because he/she wanted to end it.

    • April 3, 2016 3:12:26 AM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

    • April 3, 2016 5:06:56 AM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      I think if ENFPs were more open about what they really thought people would understand them better and not think they're self-centred. A couple of really well written blogs about feelings and relationships that I came across through links on this site have been by ENFPs. In real life my experience with an ENFP made me feel like a weirdo because I'd talk about random things like MBTI or sometimes talk about stuff going on in the world or thoughts I had and she'd look at me like wow you're just a weirdo aren't you. So that made me feel like she didn't understand what I was saying unless I made it very simple, so I started talking only about boys and fashion.. And then she had a habit of only meeting up when she felt like it or only replying when she felt like it and preferred to do things in groups almost as if she didn't want to 'commit' to talking to me and over time it put a strain on our relationship and now she wants to be friends but I don't want to be friends anymore because I feel like I give her my full attention and I don't get the same back and I can't talk about all the things I want to talk about I can't even express my feelings to her about our relationship. I'm prepared to deal with things even if it's unpleasant but she wants to turn everything into a fun outing and life isn't fun all the time .

    • April 3, 2016 7:31:44 AM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      no..... because someone stapled a frog to it.... probably an INFJ or maybe even an ENFP...

    • April 3, 2016 11:39:10 AM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      I'm surprised. I would never call an ENFP lacking in depth; they can jump from idea to idea which could be misconstrued that way. They definitely don't lack depth though. As for being self-centered, that isn't an ENFP issue. Some persons are self-centered, but that is a problem found in individuals, not personality type. Inra is probably right; it is misunderstanding.

    • April 4, 2016 2:49:18 AM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      According to Zoet, every ENFP I come across hates me QQ

      This post was edited by DoesNot at April 4, 2016 2:50:03 AM PDT
    • April 4, 2016 7:48:36 AM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      they dont have souls

      This post was edited by Deleted Member at April 9, 2016 3:24:04 AM PDT
    • April 4, 2016 8:46:57 AM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      TheBoyNamedCrow said:
      According to Zoet, every ENFP I come across hates me QQ

      Oh look a pineapple!

    • April 4, 2016 12:16:39 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      I agree with Zoet and VeritasFidelis. It's probably down to the individual, and maturity.

    • April 6, 2016 10:36:05 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      through close observation I'd say ENFPs are def not shallow but their depth's somewhat constructed. When I start an intricate conversation the ENFP will emphasize but then "well, according to my experience, i think that..." and then I'll have to listen for 10 minutes.

      can make you think they understand you REALLY well while having no idea what they're talking about themselves,

      maybe it's just this ENFP I know of, but when disagreements emerge he's very bent on convincing that others are wrong and he is right, speaking like "well, you're wrong, because I know this field and I know how that works." "Well, you're wrong although you read about it"

      tbh, I think their values are too fluid to base something upon.

    • April 9, 2016 3:26:14 AM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      It's okay ruute. I just added +1 rep to zoet. . . Just so I could take it away after.

      This post was edited by DoesNot at April 9, 2016 3:26:33 AM PDT
    • April 9, 2016 3:45:42 AM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      ohhh. that sounds mean.!

    • April 9, 2016 3:47:04 AM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      Ummm. . . I'm an INFJ. It's called justice.

    • April 9, 2016 3:55:45 AM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      I'm an INTP. I call it flirting...

    • April 10, 2016 1:48:11 PM PDT
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      why do you think enfps are self centered/lack depth?

      Huh what

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