Forums Personality Creators ISTP - Crafter
  • Topic: Weird ISTP

    Back To Topics
    • December 26, 2017 11:56:29 AM PST
      • Posts
        1
      • Thanks
        0
      • Thanked
        0
      • Rep
        0

      Weird ISTP

      I'm not English, so sorry in advance for any mistake. I'm an INFP. Me and my ISTP friend are in the same college. He almost never shows up to classes, but keeps texting me and asking me to study together. At the beginning I had the feeling he was just using me to understand math stuff (he doesn't know much cause his high school teachers were horrible, but he's very smart). It's not like he wasn't being nice to me, though.
      There was this one time I was trying to avoid a friend that has a crush on me and used to follow me everywhere and sit next to me on the train every single day. Me and my ISTP friend had just met, but he walked me to a different train station so that I could avoid the boy. At the time he was very quiet, especially when we were with people who wanted to joke/talk "incessantly" with me. I usually have that kind of non-stop conversation with everyone, but it never worked with him. Now I know it just isn't his style.

      What was bothering me was the actual result of our (rare) conversations. He used to make jokes without realizing he was being rude, sometimes mock or criticize me until I got mad. For a while I couldn't talk to him "freely" cause I was scared of being judged again. His actions were SO different, though. He wanted to get together for coffee, take the train with me everytime he could. If I was sitting too close to him, he wouldn't do or say anything. I payed for his coffee once and he insisted on paying for mine the next time, and it went on like that. I was pretty confused.

      Eventually he realized what was going on with me and told me out of the blue that he wanted me to talk more, that he wasn't going to judge me and so on. Made it sound like a joke, though.

      We started texting to help each other with math stuff but ended up talking about tv shows and other things as well. He helped me a lot with subjects he's good at (and when I say a lot, I mean A LOT. But maybe he just likes to find mistakes and correct them). Sometimes he would lose patience and complain about me, usually about math problems I couldn't solve or explain quickly enough, and get me mad again. He even told me he doesn't understand how my grades can be so high (!!!). That was SO frustrating!

      Then he started getting cold and distant in our everyday meetings but friendly on texts (telling me things about his life, joking, sharing random thoughts and songs, etc). If I wanted to keep the conversation going and ask him something, though, he would avoid the question. If I wanted him to see some funny video or just share something random like he was doing, he would say he doesn't care. Like... genuinely doesn't care. And I would feel used again.

      Two or three times he told me he never lets any of his friends see his home, but I've been there more than once. He says he doesn't like to study with people, but keeps asking me to study with him (even if we ended up doing nothing the time before). Last time we met, he was SO WEIRD. He usually is a very laid-back person but this time he looked excited (?). Joking all the time, smiling, searching for eye-contact, sending a lot of texts and voicemails once I went home. I don't know what's changed. Maybe he was just having a good day.

      My question is, what is going on? Am I being stupid and missing something obvious, or does he actually tolerate me but doesn't know how to treat people like people?

    • December 27, 2017 7:21:27 AM PST
      • Posts
        114
      • Thanks
        17
      • Thanked
        37
      • Rep
        4

      Weird ISTP

      Hmmmm. Thanks for posting.

      I wouldn't look at mbti to assess this one. Couple of red flags stand out to me.
      "He used to make jokes without realizing he was being rude, sometimes mock or criticize me until I got mad. For a while I couldn't talk to him "freely" cause I was scared of being judged again." , and
      "Eventually he realized what was going on with me and told me out of the blue that he wanted me to talk more, that he wasn't going to judge me and so on. Made it sound like a joke, though.".
      So, making you feel uncomfortable and then making you feel responsible for feeling uncomfortable.

      " Sometimes he would lose patience and complain about me, usually about math problems I couldn't solve or explain quickly enough, and get me mad again. He even told me he doesn't understand how my grades can be so high (!!!). "
      Undermines your ability and makes you feel shitty about your mistakes.

      I say run before this guy turns you into a shadow of yourself. Scared to say anything. Scared to make a mistake. Over-analysing. Over-analysing is never a good sign.

    • October 3, 2018 2:57:00 AM PDT
      • Posts
        2
      • Thanks
        0
      • Thanked
        0
      • Rep
        0

      Weird ISTP

      There is very small role of corporal punishment in building the character of the students but we abuse it with wrong power. Sometimes there is not need for punishment, with polite way one thing can be https://www.analyzedu.com/writing-services-reviews/help-plagtracker-com-review.html brought at right place but we have to struggle for it. To escape from the struggle, we use the way of punishment.

Add Reputation

Do you want to add reputation for this user by this post?

or cancel